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Thursday, June 30, 2022

Eurovision 2022: can anybody stop Ukraine winning in Turin? – live | Eurovision

Eurovision Bingo rules for tonight!

Get ready to mark your Eurovision Bingo cards! Of course, if you want to have a shot of drink each time you spot one of these things, you are welcome, but drinking is not compulsory. You can just shout “Hola, mi bebébé. Llámame, llámame!” instead, or whatever you fancy. You do you. Here is what I have got on my list:

  • A costume change!
  • Ludicrous musical instruments!
  • A cynical key and/or tempo change!
  • Someone says the evening/songs have been “wonderful”!
  • Unnecessary use of the French language!
  • Vigorous hand-washing!
  • Costumes with cut-outs!
  • Someone jumps off the stage!
  • A guitar solo!
  • Spooky ghost wraiths!
  • Someone in the crowd is waving a Ukrainian flag!
  • Someone is back performing at Eurovision again!

I’ll try and call them out. And also try not to get into complicated arguments about musicology as to whether something is technically a key change or not. We all know that cynical rising key change for the final set of choruses when you hear it.

San Marino is also another big loss from tonight’s show. Achille Lauro’s staging of Stripper absolutely killed it on Thursday, and I am a bit exasperated it didn’t progress. How many times do you get to see a lace-clad man on top of a studded leather red bucking bronco on your telly on a Saturday night, eh? Just look at it …

Singer Achille Lauro (L) kisses his guitarist as he performs on behalf of San Marino.
Singer Achille Lauro (L) kisses his guitarist as he performs on behalf of San Marino. Photograph: Marco Bertorello/AFP/Getty Images
I mean, it is one way to spend a Thursday evening, I guess?
I mean, it is one way to spend a Thursday evening, I guess? Photograph: Marco Bertorello/AFP/Getty Images
Achille Lauro from San Marino.
Achille Lauro from San Marino. Photograph: Alessandro Di Marco/EPA

Go on. Treat yourself. Give it a blast.

San Marino at the 2022 Eurovision song contest

Eurovision Bingo rules for tonight!

Get ready to mark your Eurovision Bingo cards! Of course, if you want to have a shot of drink each time you spot one of these things, you are welcome, but drinking is not compulsory. You can just shout “Hola, mi bebébé. Llámame, llámame!” instead, or whatever you fancy. You do you. Here is what I have got on my list:

  • A costume change!
  • Ludicrous musical instruments!
  • A cynical key and/or tempo change!
  • Someone says the evening/songs have been “wonderful”!
  • Unnecessary use of the French language!
  • Vigorous hand-washing!
  • Costumes with cut-outs!
  • Someone jumps off the stage!
  • A guitar solo!
  • Spooky ghost wraiths!
  • Someone in the crowd is waving a Ukrainian flag!
  • Someone is back performing at Eurovision again!

I’ll try and call them out. And also try not to get into complicated arguments about musicology as to whether something is technically a key change or not. We all know that cynical rising key change for the final set of choruses when you hear it.

The sheer number of entries these days means we have to have semi-finals, but that also sadly means that some acts who would have added a lot of joy to tonight’s event don’t make it through. I didn’t enjoy the song, but Georgia sent what I can only describe as a “Steampunk Kula Shaker” in the shape of Circus Mircus singing Lock Me In.

Members of Georgia’s band Circus Mircus at the opening ceremony.
Members of Georgia’s band Circus Mircus at the opening ceremony. Photograph: Marco Bertorello/AFP/Getty Images

It was a bit of a psychedelic extravaganza, but the viewers decided to firmly lock them out of tonight’s final.

Circus Mircus from Georgia with Lock Me In.
Circus Mircus from Georgia with Lock Me In. Photograph: Alessandro Di Marco/EPA

I have probably already given a few of the answers away in my preamble, but if you have a couple of minutes to spare, as we wait for things to get in the swing in Turin, why not have a stab at our Eurovision quiz from yesterday?

If you don’t know, unbelievable as it seems, but Mika is one of the presenters on tonight’s show. Yes, the actual Mika. He has already been tweeting from behind the scenes tonight.

Angelica Frey had a look for us earlier in the week at the entries to keep an eye out for, and what might be the favourites. But there were some shocks in the semi-final, and some have already fallen by the wayside. You can catch up with her rundown here: Sexy vegetables, banana-eating wolves and Meghan Markle’s hair – who to watch at Eurovision 2022

Here is your running order for tonight, which the European Broadcasting Union (EBU) have handily put on a social media graphic so that I don’t have to type it all out.

The running order for the 2022 Eurovision song contest
The running order for the 2022 Eurovision song contest Photograph: EBU

I remember last year promising to join in the comments, and then it all goes by so fast that it is impossible for me. So if you want to get in touch with me – particularly with photos of your Eurovision party this evening – then tweeting me @MartinBelam is your best bet. I will have a Tweetdeck column open and so will (probably) see it. I’ve already got some Eurovision Bingo suggestions set up, but I welcome any additional ideas.

Welcome to our live coverage of the 2022 Eurovision song contest

доброго вечора з лондона! That’s Ukrainian for “Good evening from London!”, and I’m glad you can join me for our live coverage of the 66th edition of the Eurovision song contest.

I’ve got to start by being totally honest with you. There is a good chance we are about to sit through four hours of the greatest and glitteriest musical extravaganza on the planet, merely to find out exactly how much Kalush Orchestra from Ukraine are going to win it by with their song Stefania.

Has the song been popular with Eurovision fans in the build-up? Yes. Will Ukraine winning be seen as a gesture of solidarity for their nation across much of Europe? Yes. Is it actually the best song we’ll see tonight? Well …

Kalush Orchestra with Stefania

Everything gets started at 9pm in Turin, which is 8pm in the UK, and about 90 minutes away. If you are joining us from Australia I am keen to hear in the comments whether you have decided to set your alarm for silly o’clock in the morning to get up and watch it, or whether you have gone on an all-night Eurovision rampage.

Even if the result seems like it might be obvious, there is a lot of entertainment to be had. We’ve got 25 songs ahead of us. The UK’s entry is tipped not to do terribly for a change, and Norway and Moldova have sent the kind of Eurovision entries that you will be seeing on clip-shows for years to come. If you like moody downtempo songs of misery sung by women, there’s a bumper crop. Some of the staging, as ever, is spectacular, and there’s one song that starts by asking “What could be the secret of Meghan Markle‘s healthy hair?”

So come and join me. We will of course be playing Eurovision Bingo – drinking is optional – and the comments on this live blog are always lively and fun. I am really looking forward to it.

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